Did you spend a half an hour this morning using industrial strength gel to fashion your hair into something that resembles a porcupine?
Do you have a spray-on tan that renders you roughly the same color as an Oompa Loompa?
Do you live in New Jersey?
Are your biceps larger than your waist?
Do you get your eyebrows waxed despite the fact that you’re a male?
Are the rims on your car worth a sum that is exponentially more than the value of the rest of it?
Are you obsessed with the Italian culture despite the fact that you, and no one in your family or close group of friends, is in fact Italian?
Do you either grow your chest hair out or shave it depending on what best shows off your gold chains?
Does your Myspace page contain more than one Italian flag? Does it sparkle?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, congratulations, you’re a douchebag.
And to commemorate your being a huge douchebag, the folks at Vegas have created a promotion just for you.
If you’re a big steaming pile of douche, you can now save $25 on a Vegas hotel room. What do the rest of us get? The satisfaction of sending them away from us. Far. Far. Away from us.
Thanks to Ryan Cook over at www.thatsjustnotright.com for pointing this out.
Tags: asshats
Comments (7)
Favorited, just for the oompa loompa reference.
If you saw some of the people I’ve dated, you’d totally understand.
Clare– How are you so well-versed on the subject? Enquiring minds want to know?
E
(speechless)
Let the entitlement generation take its roots and plant them deep….
Even Dbags need love.
Octo-mom in porn.
Deadbeats not paying bills getting saved.
Retarded banks get bailed out, and now this?!
*facepalm*